Its Friday and I am posting with Lisa-Jo Baker on Five Minute Friday - not Tuesday or Wednesday the following week! YAY!
For the past couple of weeks I have been battling a whole new layer of anxiety. I have struggled with anxiety/depression for most of my life. Someday I will elaborate on the roots of it all, but it's not relevant for the purpose of this post.
Most of my anxiety this time has been related to my kids going back to school. I am sure I am not the only one.
I am not only concerned about them returning to their other "life" that is apart from me, where they grow outside the "womb" of our home, but also concerned about how they present themselves to the world.
Have I taught them enough?
Will they be a blessing?
Will they reflect who they are in Christ or the sin they have seen in me?
Will others treat them like the amazing people they are?
Will there be enough grace to cover their imperfections and mine?
The rapid fire nature of these questions and others can make my heart race with nervous tension and my extremely solid faith in who Christ is in me quake like a 8.0 on the Richter scale.
But here is what rose up in my heart this morning:
I have given myself to Him - told Him I will do whatever He asks of me, regardless of my comfort and if I have to live like this:
2 Corinthians 12:9
But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
My oldest is plunging into third grade with some learning challenges that will require lots of grace, consistency and encouragement, my middle fella is leaping into second grade with enthusiasm and younger than most second graders, and my youngest, he will be with me, serving wherever the Lord leads, on any given day adding his spicy nature into the mix of ministry and household maintenance.
My perspective needs a CHANGE. His has never changed. It's about Him, for Him and because of Him that I live. For those who know Him, for those who don't, and for all who are in the middle, on their journey, not sure it where it will lead - I need to be who He made me to be and teach my fellas to do the same. Every day. No matter where we are.
He sees the beauty of the process. He sees the beauty of who I am and who they are. My perspective needs to be His. That is the kind of CHANGE I choose.