Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Sooner rather than later.... maybe.

So, I promised tales from the Bog bunch...
There is writing on the wall now, it looks more like the Target bullseye than Latin, Hebrew or Greek, but I think the message is clear: Do not leave any sort of writing utensil ANYWHERE that my sweet creative John can find it. After the creative writing on the wall incident and the appropriate punishment that followed I was dumbfounded to discover that the computer downstairs had highlighted keys in pink and yellow and now, this might surprise you, black Sharpie on the screen. Oh yes, it is definitely permanent... I could have lived with a pink alphabet and a yellow spacebar much better - but that came off. Now --- ALL writing objects are out of sight and out of reach. Hopefully.

As for my spiritual journey thus far --- I am feeling less poetic and introspective these days - too busy for real navel gazing - but I am reading a couple of incredible books that are altering my life in all ways imaginable. Champagne for the Soul by Mike Mason and The Supernatural Ways of Royalty by Kris Vallaton and Bill Johnson.

My precious Peter is walking and very vocal, my delightful James is full of intense energy and loves to run and sing, and my dear John is so smart and fast I wonder if I can keep up now, let alone in a year or two.

I hit the treadmill almost every day in an effort to become a "fast Mommy" to keep up with my fast boys. I am not exactly sucessful in watching my eating habits as I am still struggling with the day to day busy survival mode that is hard to break out of when you have 3 very busy little fellows. I still love my health and wellness supplements and keeping up with my water intake can be a challenge as it is not easy to get a chance to go to the bathroom some days!

I am finding more joy in every day and receiving the insight the Lord has been giving me about myself. I finally like me. It has taken a very long time to get here, but I am thankful for me and my gifts and I am excited to walk each day watching to see what God has planned for me to do. I regularly picture my head to His chest resting and listening to His heartbeat. He wants us responding to His heart - His passion - His vision for us... daily. I have recently learned about a term called entrainment (you will have to look it up for more detail) which basicly is two things aligning together in the same rhythm - or something like that. But for me, I want my heart to beat in sync with the Lord's heart. That is my prayer.

God bless you and keep you. Thanks for reading and I will try to keep more current now that I have a computer that works again...

1 comment:

Rebecca said...

I am soooo glad that I stumbled upon your blog again! I was just searching through some blogs that I follow that I haven't had a chance to peek at and saw a new post from yours-and I was so glad!

Anyways-I love your realness, truthfulness, and self-honesty. It is sooooo REFRESHING to find someone else who is as open as I feel. Most often, I feel 'over exposed' and frustrated that the rest of the world won't peel off their onion layers with me-loL!

That said-thanks for your encouraging word and prayer of "JOY" this past women's group during your presentation. I was also touched for your heart for young women who find themselves in motherhood far beyond their time. And the 'stigma' of judgement that follows where they go, even by the christian community. I love that you asked the question, and brought it out into the open, of whether or not they are receiving God's love/compassion during a season of 'exposed sin' and that MOST importantly, that baby is NOT a mistake. Well said, and NOT enough covered in our christian community.

I personally was touched by the part of 'NOT a mistake' when you spoke that outloud and my mom touched my hand at the same moment, as I was an 'accidental' teen pregnancy that both 'religious' families, I'm sure, were not happy to hear about." And as much as my own mother has reiterated those same words to me throughout my life, 'that I am NOT a mistake'...I have been shocked to realize that in the deep recesses of my heart, the enemy has wounded me there. With beliefs that I am not supposed to be here, and more strongly felt, that I am 'in the way.'

Without knowing it, the enemy has tightened his hold on those words reiterating throughout me deep in my heart, and they have exposed themselves tangibly in my life through 'shyness' and 'false humility'=pride. I am so thankful for God's exposure of these words in my life, and the 'self worth' I am receiving ONLY through HIM, and not the things of this world; including my education, physical appearance, status, giftings, and 'good works.' I am so happy to be being SET FREE from them! I've falsly believed too long, that by attaining these things, I would have worth...no longer do I believe that, as the Lord has revealed the depths of these lies to my soul/spirit over the past 2 yrs, starting w/the Beth Moore study on "I Believe'.

Thanks Jenn for your heart and all that you do.

Love ya!

Who am I?

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I have been married to my best friend for over 29 years and our children are 16, 15 and 12 years old. I have struggled with infertility, suffered the loss of a baby by miscarriage, and endured multiple career paths. I have experienced a crisis of faith that shook me to the core and lost dear friends to tragic death. I have a personal relationship with Jesus which is essential to surviving and even thriving in my circumstances. I hope you will be blessed by my heart and words. Thank you for being here..